I'm a Salad!!

Do you ever have those moments when you think your children are smarter then you expect them to be?

We stopped by Mister's office to pick him up for lunch one day. We usually stay inside Vinnie, (the minivan) buckled up, and I just make a quick call, and he comes out to meet us. Sometimes, he may have to finish something up, and it takes a few extra minutes. This conversation happened one of those times, and it has since become a classic, we refer to, when we need an extra laugh.

Fash: When is he coming?
Me: Just another minute or two.
Sass: We should pretend we are invisible!
Me: Okay, why don't you practice right now.....quietly.
Fash: Mom! Mom! Tell Daddy I am a salad!

(I turn around to see this...)

Me: A salad?
Fash: Yeah, a salad! Tell him okay!
Me: Okay, I will tell Daddy you are a salad?....
Sass: A salad? I am going to be invisible!

(Out comes Mister)

Mister: Hi guys!
Me: They can't hear you.....Sass is invisible......and Fash.......well, he is a salad.

(Mister turns around to see this)

Mister: A salad, huh.....

(He starts to tickle Sass, to try to make him become visible.....all the while Fash is holding strong to his salad impression.......)

All of a sudden for Sass apparently it clicks!

Sass: Ha Ha! I get it....it's called a SOLID! Not a salad!

We erupted in laughter! Suddenly it made perfect sense!

2.5 hours twice a week for just me.....I'm lonely!

It is official! My children are in school. Fash has started preschool. He is gone two days a week, for 2 1/2 hours. I initially thought.....wow....so much time, what am I going to do!? I know it might surprise you.....but those days......fly by.....lightening quick. I do feel like I am forgetting him everywhere I go. I do lots of turning around, looking. I am sure I look like a crazy lady everywhere I go....only difference from before is.....I usually look like a crazy lady totting a child or two. Here is the official day pictures! Does he look excited?

I am so proud of him.......he marched right in, took is back pack off.....and waved goodbye....no looking back. Wasn't exactly the magical moment I hoped to scrap book in my head, but it is exactly what I should have expected. Even his big brother says he admires how brave he is.
In his "cubby" on his first day! His favorite thing at school is to paint. Daddy's office is starting to look like a gallery.
Do you know what this means people? At first I thought it meant I was getting old......then I decided, wow.....I look REALLY good for having kids in school!

I sure do love him the bluest!!

This does not a good mother make.....

I have moved into a whole other level of evil mommy. Sass has had two loose teeth for about a month. I do not recall the loss of any of my childhood teeth. Mister remembers his well....didn't remember it being a big deal or anything. I kept figuring.....they will get really loose soon...then they will just fall out....right. Sass said he was moving them back and forth with his tongue....trying to get them looser.....evil mommy wasn't buying it. One seemed a lot looser then the other.....it will come out soon.....just leave it be......I told myself this over.....and over....and over. Seriously.......you know, a girl like me can only hold out for so long! I noticed the adult tooth was coming in........BEHIND the loose one. I figured that can't be good......it should have been gone by now. Well...........after teeth brushing, I put Fash to bed, and asked Sass if I could just "yank that one out......you know, it really WANTS to come out." Shock beyond shock....he said I could. Well.......after I did this.......

He said he was kidding.............oops......yeah......ummm......did you take notice of the very red eyes.....the poofy eye lids....and super confused look? Good.....if you noticed those.....maybe you didn't take time to notice that I actually succeeded in ALMOST pulling out, not one.....but two teeth...............What sort of momma would do that? An evil one.....

Well......after two hours.........yes.....two hours of convincing him I could pull them out, if he would just let me back at them......he finally conceded. See there.....he even has a grin above.....he is grinning because I told him I would give him a buck a tooth, if he would let me just take them out. On a side note.....he made the same agreement with his dad......while I was trying to recover with deep breaths in the other room.....after I did what I did.......

A couple of the things Sass said, that I remember.....
"mom....I am seriously freaked out."
"I am not kidding.....I am terrified."
See....those are things a momma likes to hear from their child....are they not?

So......needless to say......the kid made two bucks off of his mom, AND his dad.......then got some money off the tooth fairy. I'm not gonna tell you what she left.....cuz it was too much.....I did however see a note from the tooth fairy who told him she was leaving that much because it was his 1st AND 2nd tooth....and not to hold his breath for her to drop bank again the next time. Smart fairy.

Sooooo......evil mommy finally got off the chopping block, because I made a cake.....you know....cake DOES always make things better.....SEE....he is smiling!

Picture says it all.....

I do spend a fair amount of time on the computer. I limit the time I spend blogging....much to the chagrin of my dear sweet online friends. I would like to see you more, as I am sure you would like to see more of me.

You might want to get off the computer if your Mister comes up the stairs looking like this. I think he might be trying to get my attention. What do you think?

YEAH.....It is time to get off the computer. I don't know how often I want to see this, so I may be gone awhile.

Rocky Mountain High....Colorado...Nah...Alaska!

Sooo.....I am practically famous.....many know this, and I will now tell those of you who missed it, exactly why I am practically famous.


The summer of 1993....(yeah, I am so old now....I refer to years things happened, rather than my age.....what of it?) I began working at a fishing resort in Alaska. It was on the Prince of Whales Island, named Waterfall Resort. I had an "in" as my older brother Bruv, had spent three summers there before me.


It is a 5 star Resort, which just means fancy schmancy--so there is a share of people who come there to fish, who have fame and fortune. There has been a good amount of professional sportsman.......Football players, golfers, baseball players, basketball players, and boxers. A Couple of those, off the top of my head are: Steve Garvey, Doug Hart, Larry Csonka, to name a few. There was also the professional fisherman, Babe Winkelman, who never misses a year. Ron Popeil, the inventor and infomercial guru....I mustn't forget Barron Hilton...yeah, you know who's.....Grandfather, (who just recently took her out of his will, and is donating her 60 million to charity...tee hee.) He would bring his yacht each year, and go fishing. He is in the second picture......with his guide, who still works there. There was also this one guy who played for the Miami Heat.....I took him for a walk up to the Waterfall.....he was afraid of bears.....apparently......he didn't make much of an impression on me.....cuz I forgot his name.....he did hide BEHIND me when we came upon a black bear on the trail....wuss.


Each year Senators from all 50 states, and representatives all come to the Resort. In addition Federal Supreme Court Justice Antonin Scalia, and the Speaker of the House, Dennis Hastert (he is in the first picture....with the artist, and wife....and Mr. President) have also come to fish......I know.....I AM practically famous. I worked there, and saw them all!


The biggest Celebrity in my humble opinion would have to be......


This is for you Carrot....who is his biggest fan!..JOHN DENVER! Oh yes my friends, he did......not only that.......I invited him to a bon-fire on the beach.....ME....I did that! He agreed to come.......IF I could find him some Zinc lozenges......mission accomplished! What.......you don't believe me? I have proof!


This is me in the white hat....peering through the windows the day he got off the float plane.....trying to be inconspicuous.....WITH his guitar strapped to his back!



That is him on the left....in the hat....Come on....really it is!

SEE! There he is, singing on the beach, in front of the bonfire!

That is Steve Garvey on the far left, in the tan jacket....I know, right! Only John Denver would do that, and do it with cowboy boots on....could he be ANY cooler? Roasting marshmallows too....I know it is so over the top, I knew you wouldn't believe me if I didn't have proof....I was THERE!
I was his beer girl, yes I was.....I got him beer.....AND opened them so he wouldn't damage his strumming fingers! What, you don't believe me, I was there.....IS THAT WHAT YOU ARE SAYING?! I was too!

Ah.....see....there I am.....blue jacket....holding a Country Time lemonade......I should have gotten paid for that advertisement.....my pretty red headed friend there is telling Mr. John Denver that I am a star......and I can sing like an Angel! That IS what she is saying....really!

See.....there he is.....in total awe! So is the silly lady in the white turtle neck....she just can't even help but stare at me, because I am awesome! There you have it.....see.....practically famous!

Singing like an Angel.....I brought out the Northern Lights.....even though John Denver told his girlfriend HE brought them for her.....I think it was my singing.....giggle.

Put an X on the calendar!

So.....I know you must have been missing me lately....I have been working on a milestone at the SoDak house. We are venturing into the unknown......we are entering Elementary school. That is right folks. I am going to be a PTA momma. I know from the pictures below, the ones showing my bu-t-t.....you think PTA stands for pretty tight a$$.....but, you would be incorrect my friends......yes you would. PTA stands for.......well.....it stands for something that has to do with the school, and meetings....and carnivals.....and box tops....something like that. Yeah, I am gonna do it. Yesterday we walked Sass to Kindergarten......

Sass.....waiting patiently for his momma and Fash to be ready for our short stroll to school. He chose not to eat breakfast, though I made one of his favorite breakfast foods.....lemon poppy-seed muffins, (or bald cup-cakes if you will) I think he was a bit nervous. It is a BIG deal around these parts......they go ALL DAY, 7 hours!



Sass decided he would like to scooter all the way to school. He also chose to end that, and gave over the scooter to Fash by the time we got to the corner. I think the nerves were getting to him a bit.
By the time we got to school......and he posed his....."I got this mom" smile.....I knew everything was going to be alright. He also agreed to give me a hug on our walk BEFORE we got to school. I feared he would not want to give over the love.....you know, trying to be cool and all. He told me I could have a little hug when we got there........
Yeah, I didn't get the hug I was hoping for......I did get a "knuckle bar" though.....and I settled for that. Hey at least he chose to wear his Glenwood Springs T-shirt for his first day, showing his momma some love. I do love him the reddest.....that is for sure!

Fash sat himself down in this chair when we got there, I think he planned to stay as well. He settled for me taking a picture of him. Yeah, I love Fash the bluest, make no mistake.

I hope your new transitions go as smoothly as mine did. I guess I am going to have to let them grow......I can keep fighting it, or I can show them I am thrilled with their growth. Ack....sometimes it hurts to make the right choice.

**Sass was wiped out when we picked him up......he said the day was like 17 hours long.......today when he woke up, he said he wasn't going to school.....he was just going to put an X on the calendar, and stay home.......I just pretended he didn't say anything.....and took him to school......He told me it was a super day, and went by in like 17 seconds.....we are getting somewhere aren't we!**

Planes--Trams--and Automobiles....

I have returned from my extravagant weekend with some Hawt--totally hawt--woman! I felt like I was at girls camp for grown ups....you know, without the latrines, or the 8 girls riding up in the brown station wagon....embarrassed that their mom is driving.....the bathrooms were fantastic Carrie! Annie was super chauffeur in the beauty mobiles!

Annie and Carrie were complete hostess-with-the-mostess.....better than any Hostess cupcake....which is saying a lot if you know me.

I don't think I can do the weekend justice......so.......you want a recap....you will find it here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here, and here.

I want to tell you about my trip BACK!

We started the drop offs at the airport at about 6:30 am....my flight was at 9:00 am....so I had a little time to burn...not too much, but a little.

I was sitting at gate C38.....at 8:00 am.....after much casing of the joint, I sat down with my lovely book.......'announcement' "Flight 544 service to Minneapolis/St. Paul has changed gates to C36." *I was just comfortable...alright....moving now*

*ah.....C36....now back to my book*

'announcement' "flight 544 service to MSP has been delayed due to weather, and construction....O'Hara flights are being re-routed to MSP...and there is not enough air traffic control to handle the incoming planes."

Okay....hmmmm.....now I have another hour and a half. I have wandered all that I can in concourse C.....maybe I should just wander over to Concourse B.....on the Tram.

*return.....dejected......same stuff over there, as there was here* Guess it is back to the book.

*ACK....I am so bored....maybe I will check over in Concourse A......something more....it is a possibility...*

*return....dejected.....same-o.....same-o....you see one CO shop....I guess you have seen them all....and no sir....I do not care for your pint of milk which costs $2.99*

*ack....so bored....going to ride the tram again.....why....because I can!*

FINALLY....I get to board the plane. So what if I am row 25 of 26 rows....it doesn't really matter right.....WRONG!

It does matter.....when the Captain says, "good day ladies and gentleman....it seems there is some failure with the exit door....and we are having maintenance look it over....we should be off the ground in no time.

Reading....ignoring....reading.....ignoring.....long time passing.....

Captain, "good day ladies and gentleman....it seems when maintenance was fixing the door, there was an error in testing it, and it caused the exit door to fly off, and the exit ramp to inflate....the parts to fix this are in MSP.....we will be exiting the aircraft, and you will need to speak to Customer service about adjusting your flight."

This is where sitting in row 25 is a supreme bummer.......then you are severely at the end of the LONG line wanting to get your flight changed.

*waiting....waiting...waiting.....phone calls....waiting*

We did that for awhile, then they told us to go back to gate C38, as we were taking their plane, and they could all go and sit at gate C36 to wait for the part to fix our plane......sorry sucka's....I am getting out of here! After all......I still have a 7 hour automobile ride ahead of me when I get to my "final destination!"

We got home around midnight.....not bad for starting at 6:30 am......took an automobile to the airport.....tram to the airplane.....tram again, just well...it is a good time....airplane....automobile......and not once did I have my hand between two pillows!

Thanks girls for a great weekend, I would do my trip back 50 times over, after the weekend we had, it was so worth it!